40 Hilarious Breakup Tweets From People Who Are 100% Over It

Funny Tweets About Breakups

There are times that a breakup is hard to get through. For some, though, they can’t get rid of their ex fast enough. These breakups come in a variety of forms but they all have one thing in common — the people involved in them had a bit of a sense of humor. Whether it was intentional or ironic, these breakup stories left us in stitches.

They’re Right

There are plenty of reasons that relationships don’t work out. It’s not always the case that one or even both partners have grown to dislike one another. Still, that doesn’t mean that’s always the case.

They’re Right

As this person summed up quite nicely in this tweet, sometimes it really is one person’s fault that things didn’t work out. After a breakup, sometimes you can’t help but realize that the other person didn’t really do much to help salvage things.

A Hard Truth

A lot of couples stay in close contact. After all, most happy couples truly enjoy spending time with one another and want to keep that level of contact. It definitely isn’t for everyone, though.

A Hard Truth

This person really thought that they simply weren’t fans of talking to someone constantly. On the other hand, it’s a good idea to consider the quality of your conversation partner when you’re talking that often! Now, they can find someone who they enjoy talking to so frequently.

We’d Hope So

Everyone handles their breakup a little differently. Maybe you opt for the traditional night in with some ice cream or would rather go out with friends. We’re glad to hear that this person is doing well by the standards of Investigation Discovery.

We’d Hope So

If you aren’t aware, the network Investigation Discovery does a lot of programming about true crime, including plenty of episodes featuring some of the worst outcomes possible — just about anything would be a better way to handle a breakup.

Staying Honest

If there’s one thing that you might find yourself with more of after a breakup, it’s hindsight. It might come much later, but sometimes it’s easier to see things outside of a situation.

Staying Honest

This means that when you really start to crush on someone, you might see better of it later on. This person defined this feeling pretty well in just a few words and a picture of a trash can. We have to say, the saying on the trash can really worked in capturing people’s attention it seems.

What’s the Secret?

There are a few things in a relationship that might immediately raise a few red flags. At first, we can see why this person might think that their ex had a new boyfriend.

What’s the Secret?

However, even if they did, the person in question here is their ex, so they aren’t together anymore. Yet, if they had stopped to ask “who” Jerome was before jumping to conclusions, it may not have led to this hilarious misunderstanding.

Always on Your Mind

Not everyone likes to hear things like “we can still be friends” or other endearing clichés during a breakup. So, what can you say instead?

Always on Your Mind

Danny Ricker took to Twitter with an idea for an alternative that isn’t overly sweet but tells them that you’ll always think of them. It just so happens that it’ll be when they’re trying to log into their bank account. We’re not sure the results will be great but it’s good if you want to end the conversation.

Wait a Second

There are a lot of go-to phrases that friends might say when helping each other through a breakup. This can come in a variety of forms. One that this Twitter user took issue with was their friends claiming that their ex was ugly.

Wait a Second

Obviously, this person isn’t too concerned with their ex’s feelings, though. What they are concerned about is that in insulting their ex, their friends were kind of insulting their taste.

Hmm, Interesting

During a breakup, people say a lot of things. “I can’t live without you,” is a particularly dark approach, though. This person wasn’t about to let it go after their ex said it either.

Hmm, Interesting

In fact, they were ready to check in later to note that they were, in fact, still alive. So, it seems like their attempt to insist that this person stays weren’t as serious as their ex tried to lead them to believe.

Not Missing a Beat

As we mentioned earlier, everyone handles breakups differently. As such, you can’t really compare your experience to someone else’s and be too hard on yourself.

Not Missing a Beat

Still, there are some people who come back from a breakup so fast that you can’t help but feel impressed. It would be impressive all on its own if this person’s mom had only bought a new house and car in such quick succession — not to mention a breakup on top of it all!

Never Change

Not everyone wants to see their ex stay unhappy after a breakup. Many people wish their ex the best, just not with them as their partner. This person seems like they were genuinely happy to meet their ex’s new partner.

Never Change

Still, it doesn’t seem like they were too surprised to hear their ex’s lackluster description of their eight-month relationship. In fact, it all seemed a little too familiar to them. We wonder how their not-girlfriend would describe the relationship.

Not Pulling Punches

There are certain situations where you may stay friends with your ex after your romantic relationship ends. That isn’t always the case, though.

Not Pulling Punches

When this person’s ex hit them up to ask when they could see them again, they weren’t about to give in. Still, they weren’t going to leave them without any memory of them. Any time they wanted to see them, all they had to do was open their social media account and pine from a good distance.

Putting It All Out There

An unfortunate part of breakups is that you’re probably left explaining what happened. After all, people are probably going to ask when you tell them.

Putting It All Out There

This person seemed either really sick of going to everyone individually or just wanted to make sure there was a public record of their ex’s indiscretions. After reading this tweet, there’s no question about what exactly ended their relationship. We’re sure that their ex faced a bit more criticism with this information publicly available.

Some Interesting Options

It’s not a great feeling to have to deliver news to someone that will make them upset. This can make figuring out how to break up with someone hard. This person came up with a few options, some of which are better to avoid.

Some Interesting Options

For instance, we agree that you probably shouldn’t break up with someone over Facebook. Conversely, we might reserve the concept of breaking up with a sheet cake unless you’re sure you don’t mind really burning a few bridges. It does have a comedic factor, to its advantage.

Keeping the Photos

It can help to work through a breakup with friends or family to support you. This particular Twitter user potentially has the best support from their grandmother.

Keeping the Photos

While many people want to destroy photos of themselves and their ex, what are you to do if you like how you look in those photos? This grandma wasn’t about to give up a stash of photos featuring her grandchild so she just cut their ex out of each one. Problem solved!

Gone with a GIF

There are a lot of ways to end a relationship with someone in a way that you don’t talk to them again. A GIF is an interesting choice. Their choice of GIF only makes this exchange all the more bizarre.

Gone with a GIF

Why use a scene where a toy is getting its owner’s name erased in a breakup? It just seems like maybe Toy Story wasn’t the way to go here. At least they didn’t have to talk to them again after this.

Not a Great Look

Once in a while, you might find yourself missing your ex. Like a previous tweet suggested, some people turn to Instagram to see what they’re up to. There are some basic rules to looking at your ex’s pictures, though.

Not a Great Look

That might include that you don’t want them to know that you were looking through their page. One way to fail at that aim is to carelessly swipe your phone’s screen only to like an entire album of photos.

Thanks, Mom

When you go through a breakup, you might bite your tongue later to keep the peace. After all, maybe you don’t want to open up a fight unnecessarily. Not everyone is as convinced to keep the peace, though.

Thanks, Mom

Sometimes, they might use that power to get some of the revenge that you personally wouldn’t. Still, we feel a bit bad for the new girlfriend in question who got caught in the crossfire.

Over It

Sometimes breakups can get pretty messy. This can include accusations hurled around that are hurtful and, at certain points, just baseless and mean. It seems like this person didn’t forget everything that their ex accused them of doing.

Over It

So, when they had the nerve to hit them up and ask what they were doing, they made sure to let them know exactly what they didn’t want to hear. Hey, at least they finally got to try it all out.

Forgive But Don’t Forget

Not every breakup is as final as the last. Sometimes, couples eventually find their way back together in the end and it all works out. That doesn’t necessarily mean that your partner forgets your initial breakup, though.

Forgive But Don’t Forget

As this person can attest to, they may not let you forget it either. Yet, it’s good to see that they can joke lightheartedly about a rough patch in their relationship now that it’s all worked out.

Just Helping Edit

At some point in a breakup, anything past that point can become too little, too late. Plus, not every apology is accepted or enough to make up for the original infraction.

Just Helping Edit

When this person got a letter from their ex, they knew exactly what to do with it — all they needed was a red pen to get started. Instead of writing a letter of their own back, they made sure to offer some constructive criticism on the apology.

That’s One Tactic

There are times that your ex probably doesn’t want you looking at their social media pages. One great hint is that if you’re blocked, maybe it’s time to back off.

That’s One Tactic

Unfortunately for this person, their ex just wouldn’t take a hint to leave them alone. In fact, they went to rather ridiculous measures just to access this person’s Instagram account. They know that everyone knows that the dog isn’t in charge of the account, right?

Missing You(r Netflix)

There are times that you really miss your ex. Maybe it’s not even them but something you did together or an activity you shared. In the modern world, that might include losing your streaming services in the breakup.

Missing You(r Netflix)

After all, there’s no guarantee you’ll still have access to Netflix after you’re no longer dating the account owner. This person answered the question, “If you could ask your ex anything right now, what would it be?”

Nice Try

In a strong relationship, you know your partner fairly well. As a matter of fact, you might know them in funny, everyday ways. It comes with the territory of being together so often.

Nice Try

You start to notice things like what the other person prefers and enjoys. As this person proves, though, you might just miss it too — even if you’re confident you haven’t. What were they supposed to do with all the banana Laffy Taffy at that point?

A Little Poetry

There are some genres that are so versatile that you could use them to say anything. With poetry, you can give your insults a more measured cadence.

A Little Poetry

Whether artistic or out of ease, this person decided to lean on a recognizable poem for the base. However, the originally romantic message has been replaced with something that’s a bit harsher. They seem ready to be rid of their ex judging by this piece.

A Solid Excuse

There are plenty of reasons that you may want to break up with someone. After a while, you might get tired of trying to explain those reasons to your ex.

A Solid Excuse

When it comes to an ex trying to get back with you, in some breakups, it can be too little too late. Still, you might not necessarily feel like you want to explain things all over again. Maybe this person’s trick is just the right joke for the moment.

A Bit Unreasonable

We can see how it would be romantic to have a partner who’s a musician write a song about you. Still, not every artist is in the habit of songwriting.

A Bit Unreasonable

On top of that, most people want a song with lyrics about the romance the song is about. This claim only becomes more bizarre when you consider that this person is a drummer. How do you use the drums to portray lyrics of love when there’s no singer present?

Hitting Where It Hurts

When you’re going through a breakup, it’s a hard time. Luckily, your closest friends are probably willing to help you through it. This person found a way to lighten the mood when it came to her friend’s ex.

Hitting Where It Hurts

After all, maybe hearing “you deserve better” was helpful but didn’t complete the tone. Making him shorter each time only seems to add insult to injury but that really seems like the goal here.

An Interesting Comparison

When you’re talking about finances, a 0% interest rate isn’t a bad thing. It can even really save you money in the long run! On the contrary, the same isn’t true in all aspects of life.

An Interesting Comparison

For instance, you probably want your partner to show more interest in this. A lot more would be great but even a bit more would have been an improvement. At least this person has a sense of humor about the situation.

A Lot of Nerve

Your friends might not like everyone that you date. Similarly, your partner might not like everyone you know. It’s true that this can cause tension sometimes too.

A Lot of Nerve

At the end of the day, no one wants to see discontent in their personal circle. Still, this person definitely stepped over the line in blaming their friend for the breakup after what really happened. It’s even worse that this person said they cheated more than once!

Doing Great

There are some things that have a general formula. A fairly common example of this is the fairly well-known model regarding the stages of grief. This Twitter user decided that they would rework it to map out a general formula for a breakup as well.

Doing Great

However, instead of reaching acceptance, the final stage here doesn’t quite seem as over the relationship as you might think. Still, it’s something we’re probably all a little guilty of from time to time.

Error 404

Sometimes, you just aren’t in the mood to talk to your ex. Unfortunately, some exes are determined to get past a measure as easy as blocking them. This person came up with an alternative solution that seems fairly entertaining.

Error 404

We have to say, the best part of this is the dedication they committed to the bit. While it might work in text, they really had to keep up the joke when their ex finally resorted to Twitter.

Who Won in the End?

There are plenty of reasons that someone might find they aren’t compatible with someone. This person’s ex wasn’t exactly down for their sense of humor. Luckily, someone was ready to appreciate their humor.

Who Won in the End?

It just so happened that this person was their ex’s new girlfriend. We have to say, this is a great way to look at the situation and they have a point. We’re glad someone is appreciating their comedy.

Couldn’t Let it Go

There are some moments after a breakup where you notice that your ex was lying to you. Sometimes, it’s too late or just not worth it to confront them.

Couldn’t Let it Go

Unfortunately for this person, their ex wasn’t afraid to call them out for what they thought was a clear although seemingly pointless lie throughout their relationship. The only problem was — as this Twitter user clarified in a reply — was that they were only there for a drink anyways, making this even more of an overreaction.

In the Horse’s Defense

Sometimes, the best burns are the most unexpected ones. After all, the classic insults start to get tired after a while, don’t they?

In the Horse’s Defense

On the other hand, insulting your ex by comparing their personality to that of a cartoon character’s personality? Well, that would probably give them a second’s pause. This Bojack Horseman debate sparked a pretty devastating comment that can make us laugh on Twitter even if we’re fairly certain it didn’t make this ex laugh at the time.

Friendly Advice

When the NYCT Subway account tweeted out this message, it was in regard to someone walking on the tracks. Yet, you could adapt the solution to a lot of problems. This Twitter user might have found one of the best responses for this tweet.

Friendly Advice

Of course, even after an ugly breakup, you might find yourself missing the person or even just the familiar situation of being in a relationship. Sometimes it’s best to listen to this advice, though.

Workplace Humor

Getting through a day of work can take a lot of energy. Not to mention, your downtime can be really boring. Much like a breakup, a sense of humor can help here.

Workplace Humor

So, why not roll those two problems into one and bring a little breakup humor into the workplace? Honestly, while this person’s answer isn’t informative about the event, it does warrant a chuckle. Plus, it’s an efficient way to insult all of your exes at once.

Over the Drama

By the end of a relationship, you might just be frustrated with all of the drama that the relationship is ultimately causing at the end of the day.

Over the Drama

Once you’re out of the situation, it might be easier to have a sense of humor about it although it might take no time if you’re really over that drama. At least, that’s what this person found when they decided that they found something that described their relationship too well to ignore.

That’s Not Quite the Same

When you break up with someone, that might not just end your relationship with them. You might have some relationships that you met through your ex that you just don’t see as much.

That’s Not Quite the Same

You might have questions if your ex kept in contact with some of those relationships like with your parents. So, we can see why this person was confused although it’s hilarious that they thought it was comparable to this person talking to their own father.

It Really Helps

As we’ve covered a lot by now, there are a lot of different things that might help you feel better after a breakup. For some people, that means grabbing all your favorite snacks and settling in for a comfort movie.

It Really Helps

You might also want to take some time to focus on the positive aspects of the situation even if you’re feeling bad. For example, you’re not dating that person anymore at the end of the day.

Not a Reasonable Response

We’ve already seen how disastrous it can be when an ex makes a baseless assumption. Not only is it wrong but it can feel insulting as well. If we were this person, we’re not sure that we could forget this exchange either.

Not a Reasonable Response

We can see where the confusion came from but it might have been good to clarify “who” Michael was before using it as a chance to jump to some wild conclusions.